Updates & Mothers + Social Networks = Blarg!

Hello chaps, female-chaps and Thai lady chaps, no I'm not joking I have checked my hits and there's one from Thailand... Woo Crossed the Atlantic or whatever the name of that body of water might be.

Sooo welcome to the Update portion of this blog, not to worry I will be bashing mothers in no time.

I apologise for missing another week without this, but I've a few things in the mix and free time approaching. Woo!
And lastly (See that was, what 12seconds?) at the bottom of each blog either in brackets '()' or hyphens '-' will be the title of the Next blog, not just to bring you my lovely readers back but also to act as an incentive for me, as I've 5? ish lining up behind this one, but without further a do ....

Mothers... Just... Mothers. If you didn't get it from my first blog/rant Mothers, there children and I just don't mix well. Obviously! should I meet a spouse who is willing to receive my love child Im sure my opinion of everyone else will remain the same, but her and my spawn will be stitched into my heart and I will beat anyone who places scorn upon them... BUT! That is not the case and I will carry on regardless...

My Issue this week is to do with the increase in people that I know or rather are 'friends' with on social networking sites giving birth or getting pregnant. Right off the bat I don't want people throwing hate at me, its nothing personal, Ive more than one social networking site and there are at least fours mothers/mothers to be on each... However! Now I'd like someone to explain a trend to me.
 Taking photographs of your new born child, or the Sonogram photos and then posting them on these sites? Repeatedly! I'm all for saying congratulations to new mothers, The First Time! but not the 12th or 20th time, it gets really boring and there is only so many 'cute' posses you can put babies in when they're that old and keep still keep people interested. It gets to a point where the posts end up shouted in your face. "LOOK WHAT I MADE!, LOOK ITS WEARING A PRETTY HAT!! ITS SO CUTE11692*exclamation mark*".

I'll admit when or rather if I have a kid I'll maybe post a thing-y once, maybe with picture.. jokingly saying, "The condom broke and after 9months *insert name here* has arrived kicking and screaming... and i couldn't be happier" followed by maybe a photo of the wife with child - thats the main issue really it wouldn't be so bad were it the baby... and someone else, anyone... even a baby and a dog is better then the kid on its own - after that one photo, you want to see my kid, come round and say hi, introduce yourself to the kid. Don't comment saying how sweet it is, I may have just spawned the next Renaissance but not even Albert Einstein couldn't read an hour after birth.

I get it though, you love your kid, there is nothing wrong with that, but do we need to see them in a new pose every five minutes?

It may be because I am old fashioned but  I don't want poopie photos of me when I was a kid knocking around the internet giving anyone the opportunity to see these photo, it could harm me either socially or politically in later life. ask yourself this, you got drunk in your past clearly, it might have been the cause for why you were conceived (hey it was for me) would you really want those photos to be seen by your children? or Bosses. It will be the same for them looking at yourself from when you were a baby gets boring after awhile.

Oh and I have laugh as most people who post a large amount of photos of their kids have their privacy settings really low, come on your just make things easier for the paedophiles.

(- Next Time : Fast Moving Zombies IS CHEATING -)

Porn and the Right to view

Now there are a number of good things about being a man or boy depending on how old you are reading this and your personal opinion but that’s beside the point to be honest because hey, being a guy is pretty damned good. I could go on about the inequalities in society where men get paid more than women - because we work harder at it d'uhhh - or how we are just plain awesome but there are enough feminists in the world doing this already and it makes fairly boring reading...

So my angle, which not many have done before or they might have but not in this way. Is. PORN!!
Now there is no doubt in my mind that women do watch porn too, come on be serious ladies if you haven't seen it yourself then you’re more than likely to know of it. Now firstly it doesn't exploit the women as hey - they get paid to lay on their backs and who on earth wouldn't lie on their back and get 20K+?? No one, for lying there and moaning you get paid. So that gets any misguided points of view out the way.

Now to the point, which are being the pleasures of being a man and porn. Firstly it is somewhat socially acceptable for a guy to watch porn, so there's a big old win there. the second and most important is that porn was created for men to watch, now it’s not always just about finding it arousing some of the stuff out there is just funny, a bounce through a favourite website unearthed - some interesting, some funny and some damn right strange videos that firstly people have made and secondly that people have got off to. There’s.... midgets, obese woman, foot porn, horse porn, the Japanese favourite tentacle porn, dog porn, gay vampire porn (Twinklight, don't ask), old man porn, old women porn, interracial, gang porn, gangsta porn....

The list goes on and on even to the extent where games have porn made after them - as I was unfortunately informed by a customer whilst working in GAME, left4dead game... Left4Head on the other hand, porn. Now whether you watch this for arousal or like me watch due to finding it so very, very funny …

Besides in terms of procrastination it beats doing the work.