Saturday, 18 February 2012

Free hugs and beeping birds

Another day equals another day in the world of work and this week is a mix of actually happiness and annoyance - whats that your shocked, I'm not going to be complaining all the time, heaven forbid, but don't worry Jew-burgers I'm still the same angry, old-aged, middle class, racist youth. (Y)

Any who...
Happiness first, The 'Free Hugs' T-shirt is finally mine, thanks to the very awesome fellow employee (no names though he's a famous sheep), and if any of y'all see me in it, then a free hug could be yours... well either that or a little something extra if you are attractive. Ever the opportunist.

Now that's done with, time for the weekly piss take, which this time is beeping watches, now these watches have a settable beeper, unfortunately these are set at different times on all and/or all the watches are set to different times so one will go off, and then another and then suddenly you are surrounded in a cacophony of chirping watches and a headache of bleats that after awhile scratches at the mind. woo see that imagery. for those without imagination this pissed me off, not something to have a hangover near as it pierces any amount of painkillers. made worse of course by there being hundreds of the things its like being in a bird sanctuary and having no hunting licence.

The thing is, this isn't a petty irritation, as when these watches are manufactured they don't actually have the alarms set, for obvious reasons that it would A. drain the power and B. in this terror filled world, would a seemingly beeping and ticking box get through?
 So once more it falls on dickish customers, usually teens as well - the ones who think it'll be funny to set the watches alarms to go off one minute after each other - if I didn't have to put up with it I'd have thought that is a very sneaky and clever way to be annoying, but its one of those funny when watching not suffering through.

 For example on a icy day at my old school, a first year ran across the road slipped, landed on his side then slide for about 3seconds, crashing into the curb on the other side.... that's very funny, I nearly died laughing of course the kid wasn't... come to think of it neither were my friends.
 Hmmm, maybe there is something wrong with me - Oh well.

Wednesday, 1 February 2012

Sticky, Tricky Customers

As I stated nearing the end of the previous blog (oh yeah plugging my own shit shamelessly) customers can be jolly annoying and frustrating, I'm sure many of you have worked in retail at some point in your lives and well you know certain people can - for lack of a better word - be a bunch of dicks. if it's not them not knowing what it is they want it is that they take every opportunity to either get in your way or ruin your day.

What I find particularly annoying is when pushing large (possibly heavy) objects around, yet no matter how hard or heavy they insist in remaining in the way. the thing is a large white trolley, piled high with clothing of numerous colours, how can you not see this? answer they can and they are arses. However ignorance is bliss to these people, they expect you to move out of their way, why? well because they are the customer and you are the employee who they can make hell for should they run to a manager because of their own idleness to notice the large trolley coming towards them.

These people are not the only one nor are they the only lucky people who receive my spite in this particular blog - there is a list of names and people piling up to Mitch and mourn about for your viewing pleasure - anyway back to the point, which is the next group of people who are either blind or stupid enough to get in my way and think I won't run over their darling little brats. That's right its couples with babies - again - this time though they refuse to move out of the way! speeding through crowds as if the pram is a battering ram? what is the point? what makes these types of people the worst ... subject breaker!!!

There are exceptions of course, couples who walk slowly through crowds trying not to run over peoples feet or cause harm, these people are fine its the other lot who... subjects returner!!!

...Barrel down a corridor two a breast and expect you to move, again why should I? your a parent congratulations! your seed works/you Va-J-J can bore a spawn *clap, clap* but don't think for a second you have right of way, be polite and sure you can pass but if you take liberties that's a separate issue. for example, during the Christmas fireworks in my home town I was on my way to a restaurant the place was packed with people watching the fireworks and moving through the crowds was tough and slow but pretty explosions kept me amused, then I saw a single mother slowly moving through the crowds tapping people and saying "excuse me please" and people were happy to move out of the way, even me someone who hates children i thought maybe I was wrong and not everyone with prams has a vendetta to get somewhere faster then... wait who's this? not two minutes after the first woman had passed another single mother with pram and three of her brood came racing between the crowd she was running over peoples feet and had a storm of anger hurled at her back which reasserted my opinion of these people... the fact the stupid trailer trash ran over my own foot was little biased.... I smacked the last child and called her a douse C***

...so I balanced it out, right?