Friday, 19 October 2012

Bible Shaped Battleaxe

Any one who follows me on Twitter - @Drake_Best, Yes all 20 of you...(hint, hint) Will know I got accosted by a Chaplin the other day, if you didn't I'll boil the story down quickly:

Whilst sitting in the canteen of my collage watching the local retards sing and dance their way past trying A. To keep a straight face and B. thinking that there is more then likely a better use of my time. I was not sitting alone but the person I was with was on the phone, still pondering what on earth I was still doing there a women makes a b-line towards me. thinking she was about to make a comment about not wearing my lanyard I prepared where I was going to tell her to stick It up her arse.

I couldn't have been more wrong though, she was the Chaplin of this college apparently and was just walking around, she then started up a conversation with me as I was "looking shattered and bored", despite a number of efforts to get rid of her  she would not go and opened up a conversation on religion and preachers - As I said in my last blog about gays I don't care what people believe so long as they don't shove it down my throat. this pain in the arse women would not leave me alone, after telling her my name was Drake (because I couldn't think of any other name) she asks if it was after Sir Francis Drake - in hindsight I should have gone the whole Satan route maybe said my name was Adolf and that I hate the Jews too, but I digress. This women must have been there 30minutes yakking at me and I couldn't get rid of her even trying to get up and leave she wouldn't let me go "oh you must come see me and have another chat". Trololololol lady, not a chance.

Don't get me wrong I don't hate religion or people who have faith, one of my closest friends is heavily religious - which may sound like a cop out, but fuck you its not - My issue arises when Preachers on the street inform you that "THAT YOU ARE GOING TO HELL!" to near everyone that walks past or anyone who wants to have an argument about it, Peas and rice! I'd gladly go to hell if i didn't have to put up with you in my heaven. Why should I go to hell? I'm a nice enough person, sure I've had the odd vice and clearly watched way too much porn but does that condemn me to the very depths of hell? If it does then its going to be a pretty crowded day in hell on Judgement day.

When I say shoved down my throat I mean when religion is being forced upon people, such as when they attack others who they do not even know out of the blue, it annoys me more when religious people do it because of how a person dresses, I don't mock them on the funny hat they are wearing so why should they get angry because of the skull on my chest - god damn I like the shirt I'm wearing I'm not trying to make a statement with it, hell at the moment I am wearing a space invaders shirt but its not like I'm saying "I want space aliens to attack" so a person with a skull on their chest doesn't mean they wish death upon others, but clearly to them it does. Christianity isn't the worst faith when it comes to this though, thankfully there are more level headed Christians in the world because as times have gone on they have had to put up with pop culture, but with more traditional faiths such as Orthodox Jews and Orthodox Muslim's who hold any one with disdain who do not cover up, I would say get with the times but admittedly some clothing people where today's is only a few fibres shy of being fully nude.

So when those trumpets sound and the angels come to collect the righteous I'd imagine pickings would be rather slime around the planet. do these preachers expect to get into the 'kingdom of heaven' damning all those around them to the fiery pits with pompous language and phrases they pulled from the bible. I'll be honest as a book the bible is rather boring, the plots all over the place and in the end SPOILER ALERT the main character dies with nothing really resolved, the world keeps spinning and the Romans keep pillaging the Jews. Along with this it suffers from the unfortunate symptom of 'sequel syndrome', where the sequel is never as good as its predecessor. people should not hold themselves so highly that they think they are in the right and that everyone should think that way, I'm not, have your opinions if you will, your stupid for doing so but I'm not going to burn you for it.

In the end, they are books, and books are meant to be read, as much as I like audio books I don't want to have someone shouting passages at me on the street! It would be like spoiling the ending to a great classic. Next time I think then I'll shout passages from 50 shades of grey back at them!

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